Good Grief

“Good grief” is an expression of surprise, dismay, alarm or other emotion, usually negative. The term, a euphemism for “good God,” dates from the early 1900s. It appeared frequently in Charles M. Schulz’s comic strip, Peanuts, where various characters would use it in addressing the hapless hero, “Good Grief! Charlie Brown!” Do you ever have cause to apply it to the circumstances of your life? Do you ever experience surprise, dismay, alarm or other emotion, usually negative? The chorus resounds: “I do.” 

Grief isn’t good, but good can come out of it, though sometimes we are slow to recognize it.

The warning Jesus gave His disciples is applicable to each of us, “you will grieve, but your grief will be turned into joy.” I Thessalonians 4:13-14

Every time we wrestle with the events in the catalog of pain the Bible shows up and offers us hope, such as, “Our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.” Romans 8: 18

We are all on the scale of suffering somewhere between life being free and easy, and suffering that seems unbearable. The latter is described in Scripture as groaning. However, this darkness is not going to end in despair, not even death. If you are a follower of Jesus, this groaning will end in God’s glory and your joy.

Grief is a form of pain, physical or emotional. Dr. Braun, director of the former leprosarium near Baton Rouge, was asked if he could give a person suffering from leprosy one gift, what would it be? He said he would give them the gift of pain. Not being sensitive to pain they might put their hand on a hot stove, and not feel the heat injure themself seriously. Pain, like all suffering, is a warning signal something is wrong.

Consider the form of pain: grief. The big three in terms of loss usually involve the death of a spouse, child, and/or close family member, becoming unemployed, and, finally, moving and/or the loss of a home. But there are many other major life changes that can cause grief, too—things like illness, disability, separation, divorce, abuse—all excellent candidates for triggering a grief response. That’s why how you handle grief is so important. 

Grief is love with no place to go. It is the final stage of love. As such it often awakens us to the need of God from which comes all comfort. You don’t have to suffer alone. The same Jesus who wept at the tomb of Lazarus wants to be your companion in time of grief. Overcoming grief takes time. Don’t try to ignore it. Internalizing it can be emotionally harmful. There is an old hymn with a line that offers comfort, “Take it to the Lord and leave it there.” Express it to Him.

Claim these promises.

“And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.” (I Peter 5: 10)

“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”

Life’s Furnaces

In some forms of smelting gold to purify it, it is heated in separate sequential furnaces. In other words, any impurity not filtered out by the heating of the first furnace was heated out by the second, and soon until the gold is pure.

That is basically true of one’s spiritual life. You think of furnaces in which your life has been. Consider these:

The furnace of grief. Loss is never desirable, but it happens. When it does, how do you react? Can you find God in grief? Is there a tendency to blame God or seek His condolence, the peace that passes understanding?

The furnace of an injury or illness offers an opportunity to find strength only God can afford. Do you rely on Him and trust His positive involvement or become hostile toward Him?

The furnace of the loss of or failure to get a desired job is one in which there is opportunity to find refinement. Only through faith in a loving God can we survive the grief and pain of loss.

Not only are these negative furnaces, blessings can also serve as furnaces. 

The furnace of financial gain often causes the flame in the furnace to get hotter. It is often a test to see if you can stand prosperity or does it take you further from the Lord.? Which prevails, God or greed?

The furnace of promotion. Does acknowledgment of your ability and resulting accolades cause you to focus on”the wonderful me,” and not God?” Ego often results in sweltering heat in the furnace.

Often we plead with God to change our circumstances, to turn off the heat, and it is not our circumstances He wants to change, it is us, and the circumstances are designed to do that.       

Many times we hope that God will change our circumstances, will calm the storms of life (and in a hurry, too!), and when it doesn’t happen as we hoped, we easily become despondent and even pessimistic.

In these and other furnaces there are blessings to be found. A loss is at times actually the removal of an impediment to spiritual growth. Losing often serves as a purifying factor in that constant good times often draw us away from God. Wait on the Lord. The gold coming from the last furnace could not be pure had it not gone through the furnaces of life.

Remember God said: “When the time came for me to show you favor, I heard you; when the day arrived for me to save you, I helped you.” (II Corinthians 6: 2 [GN])

We can live forty days without food, eight days without water, four minutes without air, but any furnace will consume us in an instant without faith in God. Express your faith , hope, and love for Him.

In all these things we can be more than conquerors. 

God Bless

“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord lift up His countenance upon you and give you peace.” Numbers 6:24-26

The people of Israel had been bivouacked at the foot of Mt. Sinai for almost a year after leaving Egypt. God had blessed them with the gift of the Ten Commandments. Now it was time for them to possess the land promised. The time for action had come when He had Aaron pronounced this five point blessing on them. Though it was specifically for them it is relevant for us.

We, as they, can have confidence knowing God is the source of all blessings. “The Lord bless you.” This is a declaration, not a petition, it is a promise: “I WILL bless you.” “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father….” (Ephesians 1: 17)

God offered His blessing to each of the 2,000,000 in the camp. “The Lord keep you.” The little word “you” is personal. It applied corporately, but it shouts “you.” He still watches over us personally. He knows you, He loves you, and He blesses you.

God is spoken of metaphorically as condescending to bless us. “The Lord to make His face shine on you.” The Hebrew word for “bless” means to kneel down. It is a reference to Him personally blessing every one. 

God acts as a father relating to his child. Lovingly the father lifts his child over his head and the child beams with joy. This pictures God as showering His blessings on us and having great pleasure in blessing us. Likewise, we have pleasure in His blessings. His blessings are defined as being in Jesus. 

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ.” (Ephesians 1: 3)

God offers peace amid chaos. The Hebrew word “shalom” used to describe this blessing, now is used as a Jewish greeting, means to restore a relationship. As used here shalom is God’s word for wholeness and goodness and total satisfaction in life. This is the abundant life Jesus promised (John 10:10).

Though it speaks of harmony it means more. It speaks of completeness. He wants to be one with us affording fulfillment.

God pays attention to you. “Lift up His countenance on you.” This means He is mindful of you.

You…you…you…you…you…you: It is repeated six times for emphasis — God wants to bless you. 

Pause now and thank Him for His blessings.

Decisions

Have you ever made a decision and later regretted it? If you never have you stand alone in the small world of the perfected. Often a decision that proves to have been the wrong one leads to not just regret, but remorse.

To minimize doing so, there is a simple rule. It is this, resolve to make decisions on the basis of two factors: one, is the knowledge available at the time of the decision, and the other is unmitigated love.

Consider this scenario. On a timeline the decision is made at point “A.” It is made on the basis of the information available at point “A.” And in light of love.

Some time later at point “B” more information is available and the love is still strong.

It is unfair to yourself to judge a decision made at point “A” in light of the fuller knowledge available at point “B.” Accept your point “A” decision as one made at that time based on the knowledge available and your undiminished love you had at the time.

In Psalm 15 King David asks and answers a question regarding who is pleasing to the Lord. Among the qualifications is the person “who keeps an oath even when it hurts, and does not change their mind….” (Psalm 15: 4)

This relates to the person who made a decision at point “A” and was not later swayed by conditions at point “B” to change it even if it costs him or her.

The matter of decision making is not primarily about the decision, but you. It reveals your character and stability. 

Never make a major decision when fatigue, hungry, angry, or distracted. 

Conditions are requiring faster and faster decisions. For those important decisions, take time to meditate on God’s wisdom before making a possible error in judgment.

Focus on one major decision at a time. Research reveals that performance suffers by up to 40% when we focus on two cognitive tasks at the same time! In Luke 10:41, Jesus said, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one.”

A prayer worth offering before making a decision is, “Dear Father, I am making this decision in light of the insight I have and based on my love for you and others. If it is wrong, it is because of my ignorance, not my obstinance. If it is wrong please forgive me. If it is right, please bless it.” 

A commendable way to approach all of life, but especially in decision making is, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.” (Prov. 3: 5, 6)

Keep your understanding of points “A” and “B” in mind. They are basic.

When Loss Is Experienced

God takes no pleasure in our sorrow and grief,… BUT He will take part in them. Since it is inevitable that we will experience difficulty, it is expedient to know how best to deal with it. The following is not only applicable in times of sorrow, it is pertinent in times of trying to solve all of our challenges.

Calling us to come out of the cave of self-bewilderment Jesus said: “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted” (Matthew 5:4).

The Greek word for comfort is the word “parakaleo.” It’s formed from two words: para, which means “close or near,” and kaleo, which means “to call, invite, invoke, or beseech.” Thus, mourning, or any form of sorrow, is an invitation to come closer to God. “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.” (James 4: 8) This enables healing to be found amid hurting.

Pay special attention to the relationship. We are to draw near to Him. That is contrary to the way many respond when hurting most. There is a tendency to become more introverted and often accuse and blame God. Don’t retreat from Him, instead draw near to Him. He is awaiting your response.

“Therefore the Lord will wait, that He may be gracious to you; And therefore He will be exalted, that He may have mercy on you. For the Lord is a God of justice; Blessed are all those who wait for Him.” (Isaiah 30: 18)

It is not so much that God gives us sorrow to draw us near to Him, but that in life it happens often and God wants to use it to comfort us.

Amid the turbulence in the storms of your life listen and you will hear His invitation, “parakaleo.”

SORROW HELPS US IDENTIFY WITH JESUS
At the tomb of Lazarus it is said, “Jesus wept” (John 11:35). If He wept, and He did, we should not expect not to weep.

Jesus enquired where they had laid the body of Lazarus, saying, “’Where have you laid him?” They said to him, ‘Lord, come and see.’ Jesus wept” (11:33-35).

SORROW HELPS US RELATE TO OTHERS WHO ARE SUFFERING
“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” I Corinthians 1: 3, 4 

Sorrow in our own problems helps us relate to others in theirs.

For followers of Jesus their sorrow is an opportunity to witness His faithfulness by their example of dependence and the comfort they receive. People are watching.

At a time of great tribulation in Jerusalem the Lord said, “Comfort ye, comfort ye my people…” (Isaiah 40: 1) The same call goes out to today’s hurting world.